SUCC 1st - 5th Grade v Mosman.
SUCC Metro v Penrith.
SUCC PG's v Fairfield Liverpool.
SUCC Green Shield v .
SUCC Sunday League v ? @ Uni 2.
SUCC City and Suburban v ? @ Boronia.
The "Max Bonnell Golden Pen Award" points tally
1st grade | 2nd grade | 3rd grade | 4th grade | 5th grade | 6th grade | PG's | Green Shield | City and Suburban | Sunday League
Mosman all out 253: Tom Kierath 4/86, Ian Moran 3/47, Josh Toyer 2/50
Sydney Uni 4/87: Greg Mail 34*, Ian Moran 30*
A hot morning in Mosman. Secret salmon pulls out “The Squid”, the latest invention designed to make putting on a batting grip just that bit easier. Liam has only just finished putting all the bits together by the time Mail has put on his grip with the old trusty bat cone. A bit too much effort than its worth (note: Liam broke the squid the following morning, after making Jonesy’s bat look like some kind of torture device).
9 of the boys counted down the clock. 2 cases of beer are on for sure here. Scotty’s car pulls in, the boys are egging on the seconds but unfortunately Scotty makes it onto the ground, cricket kit and whites flying everywhere, with 7 seconds to spare. Oh well, we’ve still got one case. Nope, Morgs has appeared from thin air and is standing behind us all along. What a stitch up.
Nash = TK vs top 6. The rest of the bowlers are passengers. Milf kicks the ball into the Amazon just below Allan Border, giving us an extra 10 minutes of play while he searches for the ball. Somehow it’s 3-3 with last play to come. Cue batsmen’s luck and a run through to kill off the bowlers.
Plenty of bad jokes about the boys who ventured into the west during the week, mainly from TK and Ian. Predictable.
Although I’m not certain, I’m pretty sure Gerg loses the toss again, as we are told to warm up for a bowl. Also predictable. Lots of work to do, seeing as Hector is off at a Hillsong wedding and Nigel has pulled up lame from WA. John winds back the clock by getting to bowl downhill with the breeze for the first time in years. Mosman’s openers don’t have much of a clue, and they are soon 3 for 15. Lots of bounce and carry in the wicket, however this isn’t to last and the wicket flattens out. Units bowling good areas and taking their catches. Mosman 6 for 110. Their number 7 looks like he can actually bat. No lid though. Scotty hits him in the head, sounds very woody. 1 dollar for the Mosman batsman at the non-strikers end who doesn’t even go to see if he’s alright. Pitch getting flatter and flatter. Their number 10 can’t block the ball, but looks alright when he has a slog. Their number 11 middles everything. Should probably reverse the order. Although we are out in the field for a bit longer than hoped, the units do alright to restrict Mosman to 253. Maily bowls 16 more overs than he would have liked. TK the pick with 4. Scotty not far behind with 3.
There is still nearly 2 hours left to bat. Chris Griffin snicks off for 0. Patches leaves a straight one. Hayza still battling a few demons from Perth. Milf forgets to start again following his good form of late and is caught at gully. 4 for 27, not too many smiles in the pavilion. Thankfully the stalwarts Mail and Moran see us through to the end of the day with customary style.
Match in the balance, lots of work to do next week to get the points.
Number 2
Day 2
Mail 62, Toyer 55*, Moran 43, Cowell 29
Once again, no one was late, leaving us surprisingly dry in the post-match beer stakes (especially when Mosman charge through the nose for beers). However, the wicket was surprisingly wet, prompting predictions of exactly how late we would start today. After a lot of milling around, the umpies eventually informed us that 11:30am would be the starting time. The shortened nash affair was forgettable, I’m pretty sure the bowlers corpsed it again even with the extra man. Don’t worry lads, this form slump is only temporary.
We would need to build partnerships if we were going to chase down these runs. Unfortunately Scotty pulled one to the keeper early leaving us 5 for 104. Although the pitch was playing very well thanks to the sun and the roller baking out the wicket, the units were unable to forge any meaningful partnerships. Maily departed for a typically classy 62, Liam was caught in the slips, TK was caught and bowled, and Morgs snicked off, leaving us 9 for 161. Needing 90 odd to win, with 1 wicket in hand, the 6 points looked firmly out of our reach. What followed involved a combination of a few lucky snicks (we were still owed a lot from the Mosman innings), some dubious fielding, tail-enders determined not to lose their wickets, and suddenly Mosman were squabbling in the field and had their heads down. Taking it a few runs at a time, the target had suddenly become very gettable. Unfortunately, with 8 runs to get, our luck ran out and Nigel was finally caught out at third man.
A valiant effort, but we really gave this game away at crucial stages with the ball and bat. Luckily, we can redeem ourselves in less than 24 hours against Bankstown.
Syd Uni, all out 310, Mosman 0-not much, Skins 123, Younis 64, Quoyle 81.
On a brilliant summer’s day, the firsty fours (that pun works on two levels by the way, just think about it, and then look at the ladder) rocked up at the recently utterly deforested and disected number two oval. Nash was played, and to be honest, is best forgotten, save for the notable absence of a Mister N.Burke, of Paddington, who had remained uninformed of the closure of the Eastern Suburbs trainlines for the weekend. Again the state government fails to provide for the poor people of Paddington and the Eastern Suburbs, will no one stop the rot? The new skipper Dave “here, everyone, have some free protein powder, no, take some more” Crawford, did the right thing by tossing the coin, and whatever the result of the toss was, the dents stuck the pads on. The Snow leopard and the rowdiest of Barwicks opened the batting, and it was all looking pretty good til Rowdy missed one. Enter Justin “the artist formerly know as” Younis . He and the leopard proceded to smash the mosman attack to all parts, with skins being particularly ferocious on a certain Chris Dan, who has turned to the dark side in the off season. A few wickets fell and Ed Quoyle entered the arena, and while taking quite some time to get off the mark, he gave us a masterclass in mature, responsible batting, compiling a well made 81. Still the day belonged to Matt Skinner, who played a classy innings full of beautiful, and on the occasion of a full toss from the spinner, brutish strokeplay. The shine was taken off his innings somewhat when he was out stumped, off Chris Dan, after failing to regain his crease following what he was certain was a plumb LBW shout. One dollar. The rest of the sorry mob quite frankly didn’t do a lot, the sole highlight of the last part of the innings being Ben Joy’s agonising over whether to wear his helmet with or without the grill. So it is left to us to finish the job next week. The End.
Goldilocks
Sydney University – All Out 296 off 69 overs (Khongwar 60, Waterlow 54, McKay 53, Geldon 3-40) vs. Mosman – 1/21 off 9 overs (Metcalfe 1-9)
Day 1
An unusually early start for your scribe and Alex “Sticks” Logan, as the executive decision was made to arrive at the ground an hour and a half before the scheduled time for a swim and a chance to tan and show off the rigs, all was in readiness at Balmoral for battle between two very inexperienced 5th Grade sides. However Sydney Uni started with the upper hand as we have Mr. Experience himself, James Rodgers.
Enter the football and the combatants ready for the gruelling test of mental and physical skill, Nashball. The usual structure of Old vs. Young set with James worried about this as “if it’s old vs. young, it will be everyone against me”. David “I rate myself as being quicker than Usain Bolt over 22 yards” Brooker shocked at his selection on the Old team, despite being just 21, showed the inexperience of the side. This inexperience was definitely displayed within the following game, which resembled something that definitely wasn’t Nash, with highlights including a long range effort from Gus “Mighty/Angry/Grand Angus” Glynne to open the scoring, and a blistering run down the outside by James Rodgers, unusually sighted outside his usual spot of goals. However the Old triumphed in the end with Young needed to work on their game with some very poor play. The toss followed with a much appreciated win by James and a chance to bat on a relatively good batting wicket.
Aaron “My body stores fat like camels store water” Khongwar and Alex “Sticks” Logan walked eagerly to the crease to start the day. However Sticks was walking back soon after when a ball rose and caught the shoulder of the bat to be caught in the cordon for a duck. Enter Ash “I don’t wear a hat because it will ruin my hair” Crasto and the start of a strong 1st wicket partnership. Khongwar was batting in his usual style, block, nice drive for two, wild slog, block, and Crasto nudging the ball around for twos before exploding with a flurry of the willow punishing the ball to all corners. However the entertainment came to an end where, according to Ash, he left a ball wide outside off stump only to be given out caught behind when you could park the car in the gap between bat and ball. At 2-63 off 17 we were in a steady position, however loss of wickets could be detrimental for the cause, on a ground with a lightning outfield. At four was Angus “I only met the guys during the warm up, so I don’t get a cool nickname” McKay with his debut for the club. This proved to be a vital partnership with Khongwar teeing off with an innings of 60 consisting of five fours and two sixes and many easy twos turned into hard fought ones, before succumbing to a ball that looked nice and juicy..if only he didn’t miss it and get stumped. Virosh “very long last name so only a shortened version will appear in the report” Poolagas came and went for an unlucky duck, run out at the bowlers end off a McKay straight drive. David “I thought I could make it” Brooker then came, hit his first horn for the season and proceeded to back himself to get in for the second when the ball had already been thrown and get run out by two foot. Jarrod “I promise not to give Khongwar’s hyperactive brother sugar again” Waterlow then made his way to the middle, with his first bat in Fifth Grade after a TFC the game prior, to negotiate a tough little session before tea. This was done with a quiet over and Sydney Uni went to tea at 5-131 in a precarious position. After tea however Waterlow and McKay proceeded to handle the spinners with ease, McKay passing fifty, with Waterlow trying to catch up in boundaries. McKay was then bowled for 53 (on debut, good start for the club) and Peacock closely followed him when he was bowled by a duck, the only two balls that did anything all day. Waterlow and Gus “Mr G/She’s a naughty girl with a bad habit for drugs” Glynne had a short cameo adding 41 before Waterlow departed to a caught behind for 54 (his first bat in grade cricket). Enter Greg “It takes about seven seconds before I burn” Metcalfe, previously facing one ball all season, with two outs after a diamond caused by yours truly in sixes. An assortment of boundaries from the pair, including crack cover drives by Metro, and well placed cuts from Glynne progressed the score to 9-296, bringing James “only been out once in three seasons” Rodgers to the crease, however he was stranded on zero not out when Glynne was caught, ended the innings on 296.
With nine overs to bowl at the Mozman openers Glynne and Metcalfe gladly took the new ball, with a fiery opening spell from both ends, with Glynne unlucky to get a breakthrough but Metro trapping the more senior opener on the crease progressed the Mozman innings to 1-21, with Rodgers finishing off the day with a pressure filled maiden over with men all around the bat.
With work to do for a good win next week, our bowlers should be able to secure the points next week and show the twos and threes how to defend totals with sensible bowlers.
Jarrod “Low Tide” Waterlow
SUCC 117 (Sam Mahabady 50 not out, Cormac O'Connor 22) and 4 declared 220 (Will Shirvington 89 not out, Simon Cowan 87) beat Penrith 7 declared 125 (Sanju Singh 2-27, Dave Gatt 2-37, Paul Bertelle 1-3, Campbell Nugent 1-25) and all out 65 (Singh 3-10, Shirvington 3-38, Dave Gatt 2-3, Campbell Nugent 1-6, Paul Bertelle 1-6).
Where do you start to tell the story of this amazing game of cricket?
Badly affected by the loss of players following the reshuffling of bodies through the various grades, the Uni boys turned up at St Andrews with a little trepidation not knowing what to expect playing against the undefeated competition leaders Penrith. The boys have a sneaky suspicion as to how the Westies managed to be in such a lofty position - but more on that later!
There is so much to tell about this game that we will dispense with the Nash commentary, though I guess the fact the guys did not play it on either day has something to do with this.
Skipper Paul Bertelle won the toss and had no hesitation batting. Looking at the opposition and the number of squeaky voiced cherubs, he considered some non-hands on child bashing in order.
However, 34 overs, some indescribable batting and 117 runs later, the puberty blues mob had made the boys look like a refuge for old farts. Only Slammin' Sammy Mahabady with a fantastic knock of 50 not out and young Cormac O'Connor - now you can't get more Irish than that - could hold their heads high. After being a crazy 7-42 in just 13 embarrassing overs, the duo took the score to 114, batting for 19 overs to add some respectability to the total.
Eager to make up for the woeful batting, the Uni boys came out firing and soon had the whipper snappers under pressure with Singh (two), Nugent (one) and Gatt (one) reducing the Westies to 4-23 after eight overs. Two more wickets had Penrith a nervous 6-68 and Uni had serious thoughts of taking first innings point.
However, several highly dubious, to say the least, umpiring decisions (a good reason why you should never allow parents of players involved in the actual match to umpire) eventually saw the opposition pass the total before declaring at the end of play at 6-125.
There was a steely look in the eyes of Bertelle's Babes, Boffins and Beasts at the start of the second day. There was no way they were not going to do down at least making a fight of what was a grim situation. Quick runs was the order of the day with a view to some sort of declaration certainly in the back of the mind. After his first innings heroics Slammin Sammy was promoted to open the batting but soon lost his opening parter with the score on five as thoughts of a repeat of the first innings disaster reared its ugly head. Sam made 13 before he and Bertelle (a well compiled 18) also departed to leave us 3-50 after 20 overs and just 41 runs in front.
By this stage there were thoughts that, surely, the game was out of reach.
That brought "Lunch box'' Shirvington and Smash Cowan together for the fourth wicket, but they did little to raise the hopes of a batting resurgence as they perfected the chooks without a head routine brilliantly. No worse display of running between the wickets has ever graced the hallowed grounds of Sydney Uni. The fact they survived was more out of good fortune and terrible fielding than good management.
Still, like the seasoned campaigners they are, Shirvo and Smash got their act together to produce some of the sweetest batting you'd ever wish to see. They took to the nappy brigade with such ferocity that the kids' mothers almost ran out of Huggies. Straight drives, cuts, pulls, mid wicket rockets to the boundaries...it was all there as they clobbered a 162 run partnership in just 31 overs. The real interest was who would end up with the highest score as they were neck and neck once they reached their 50s. Smash Cowan (87) thought he had got Shirvo (89 not out), but it was not to be.
As a cloud of Johnson's baby powder hung in the air and with dummies and used nappies strewn all over the field, Bertelle called a halt to the carnage at 4-220, leaving 27 overs for SUCC to pull off what would be a miracle victory.
To their credit, Penrith decided to have a crack at the chase. ''We got 200 in 20 overs to win a game recently so why can't we get 211 in 27 overs'' the Penrith captain was heard to say to his troops. Sound reasoning, except he forgot one thing - they were playing SUCC.
Aided by a Bertelle masterstroke in opening the bowling with Shirvo's pies (balls that bounced five times before reaching the batsmen and balls tossed so high the batsmen almost dislocated their necks looking up) and with Singh bowling like a left handed version of Dennis Lilee, Penrith were soon in trouble at 6-43 after 14 overs. ''Just close up shop now'' the Penrith skipper was heard telling his boys after a wise re-think of the situation. The tune had well and truly changed with Singh (3-10 off 8 overs) and Shirvo (3-38) having given the team a real sniff of pulling off the impossible.
At 6-60 after 21 overs, meaning there was only six overs left for them to survive, the Penrith boys were proving to be good listeners as they followed their captain's instructions.
But, "Nugget'' Nugent claimed a wicket. 7-60 after 22 overs.
Then lo and behold, wonders will never cease...an LBW. A ball from Bertelle kept low and there was no way the umpire could turn this appeal down. 8-61 after 23 overs.
Another inspired bowling change followed. On comes Gatt. Wicket fourth ball. Nine down. It should have been game over with the sixth ball, but, amazingly, a raucous appeal for caught behind was turned down even though keeper "DD" Domenici said the batsman had got that big an edge to the ball that there were splinters flying everywhere. 9-63 after 24 overs.
Bertelle tried to pull a swifty by reintroducing Dennis Singh. But he had bowled eight overs in his first spell and had not been out of the attack long enough to be allowed back on. Bertelle ended up taking the over himself, a maiden. 9-63 after 25.
Then jubiliation. Bowling the second last over of the day, Gatt snapped up the last wicket with his second ball, proving the word ''impossible'' does not exist in the SUCC vocabulary.
Bertelle then led the boys on a stirring rendition of the club song that reverberated around the hallowed surrounds before racing off to the no. 1 grandstand to re-live the glorious day.
It would be remiss not to give a little bit of a pat on the back for the Penrith young 'uns (they do have some good talented cricketers in the side) and the skipper, who at least played the game the way it should be by not closing up shop.
But, also a brickbat for them. Trying to upset the opposition (i.e Bertelle) by likening them to a particular and unfortunate section of the mentally handicapped population (Down Syndrome) is not in the spirit of the game nor does it reflect well on your team, your self or your club. The stinging reply hopefully put them in their place.
The Spectator